Wednesday, March 5, 2008

I dropped out of school today...

It's strange what happens when you decide to "face the music"... I realize how against the grain my current line of work is to who I am as a person. I also realize that my so-called goals, are not really my own - just a disguise for what the world expects, and in turn, what I am doing to "please" the world.

I want out, ASAP. In reality, I don't care if I'm rich, as long as I'm happy. I'm not sure how I convinced myself that making money would make me happy. I'm not very materialistic to begin with. I'd rather be poor and in love with my life than rich and miserable. I don't want to wake up everyday of my life, hating my job. I've never done what's "right" and "sensible"... so why start now?

I realize I'm a "make ends meet" sort of person to begin with - in a word: resourceful. But life isn't about making money and amassing wealth. Life is about enjoying the time you're spending while the days pass you by. Maybe my friends aren't so backwards. Maybe being poor isn't the worst thing that can happen to you (like I began to start believing). Maybe simply not wanting to be living your own life is the worst thing that can happen to you. I feel like that's the boat I'm in right now :(

1 comment:

Daniel said...

I will say that your earlier financial thoughts sounded little out of character. But it's not like you're juggling 2 jobs because you want extra cash. You're teaching music because it makes you happy. I always looked at your 9 to 5 as a means to an end, doing what you love. As long as you don't lose perspective, I think you'll be fine. :)